This guest post is by Saloma Furlong, author of Why I Left the Amish
My very first class at Smith College is an astronomy course.
The professor has put up an image of a child sitting on a sandy beach and this child is holding fistfuls of sand. The professor starts out by saying that there are more galaxies in the universe than there are grains of sand on earth.
He goes on to say that scientists do not know whether the universe is finite or infinite. But they do know, he said, that there is an infinite number of mysteries in the universe.
As I sit here, I try to absorb these cosmic ideas, I feel like my mind is expanding, to make room for all the new ideas I am being exposed to.
Besides this astronomy class, I am enrolled in beginning German, Scandinavian Mythology, and a philosophy course on ethics. In a single instant, I know I am in the right place, doing the right thing, at the right time. I am finally realizing my lifetime dream of earning a college education.
A lifetime of waiting only added to the feeling of euphoria in this rags-to-riches educational experience.
I am 47 years old, and I have just begun my education as an Ada Comstock Scholar at Smith College. The Ada Comstock Program is for women who have not finished their college education at the traditional age, for one reason or another. And I have my reasons.
I did not go to high school because I wasn’t allowed to.
I grew up in Ohio, and I wasn’t allowed to go to high school.
You might wonder how that’s possible in a country that has compulsory education laws. It’s because I grew up in a culture that is allowed to live by different standards than the rest of the citizens of this country.
I grew up Amish. Because of the ruling in the United States Supreme Court case, Wisconsin v. Yoder in 1972, the year after I had just graduated from eighth grade, the Amish became exempt from educating their children beyond the eighth grade.
And so they don’t. If you are thirteen and have just graduated from eighth grade, it doesn’t matter how much you want to go back to school, you cannot go back.
The roots of the traditions of the Amish are much deeper and stronger than your desire to go to school. Eventually, you will have to come to terms with this reality.
It is a given that you work for your parents after that—either inside or outside the home. If you work outside the home, you are expected to hand over your wages to your parents until you’re twenty-one years old, unless you get married before that.
I finally rebelled against all the injustices in my life, including being physically abused by my mentally ill father, when I was twenty years old.
When I left, I went far away from home and the only life I’d ever known—I went all the way to Vermont. I picked Vermont because of the pictures I had seen in my seventh-grade geography books.
I loved my new-found freedom in Vermont. I established a social life, became a waitress, and began dating.
Then one Friday night, my adventures came to an abrupt end, when a van from Ohio showed up on my doorstep. The bishop. His wife. My uncle, also a minister. His wife. My older brother, who had brutalized me as I was growing up. My sister. A friend. They were all there.
They had essentially brought the community to my doorstep in Vermont. I could not run. I could not hide. I could not resist. And so I went back.
I had dated a young toymaker and street peddler, David, while I was in Vermont. I had to leave him and my new life of freedom behind.
I tried to make myself Amish for nearly three years, while David waited in the wings.
When I finally decided to leave, David drove to Ohio and took me back to Vermont. We were married a year and a half later.
I acquired my GED as soon as I left the second time, and began taking college courses. When I became pregnant with my older son, I decided to postpone my college education. But I promised myself that someday I would return to college.
When my sons were both in high school, I began taking classes at a local community college. I kept hearing about the Ada Comstock Program at Smith College. When I heard about it a third time, I decided to look into it.
When my older son was in his second year at Johns Hopkins University, and my younger son had just enrolled in his first year of college, I applied to Smith College. I was accepted with nearly a full scholarship. How could I say no to that?
And now, sitting in this cosmic class at Smith College, I am so glad I said yes. I may have come late, but I don’t care.
I am here now.
About Saloma Furlong
Saloma Furlong graduated from Smith College at age fifty. She is the author of two books, Why I Left the Amish and Bonnet Strings: An Amish Woman’s Ties to Two Worlds. Her story is featured in the PBS documentaries “The Amish” and “The Amish: Shunned” on American Experience. To read more about Saloma Furlong, check out her: Full Bio | Website | Blog | Goodreads Page | Amazon Author Page.
Source
- Opening Image: Star of the Hero by Nicholas Roerich (1936) via WikiArt.org